Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Silence and Solitude and Teeth

A few months ago, I posted about a silence and solitude exercise we did at church. We had to go off by ourselves and be silent and alone for an hour. We had a choice of exercises: visualizations, Lectio Devina, intercessional prayer. Because I'm a visual person, I chose the visualization exercise. It was something like this:

Hold your hands out in front of you and close your eyes. Ask God to put a physical representation (object) of yourself into your hands.

Easy enough, right? So I sat down crosslegged in the silent, solitudinous area I'd chosen. I put my hands out in front of me, and I silently asked God for an object. I waited. And waited. I focused my thinking; I shut out the world around me. I focused on what that object was going to be. I set my mind's eye on my hands and waited. And after about ten minutes, God gave me an object:
A set of chattering teeth.

I was shocked. I was hurt. What? I thought. This is what represents me? You have to be kidding! A set of teeth that just jabber and don't say anything? That's horrible! Tell me what this means!

And the reply was, This isn't what I think of you, Rachel. This is how you think I see you. This is how you think others see you. But this isn't really you.

Oh. OK. Then how do you see me?

I put my little hands out again, and I closed my eyes and waited for another object to appear. And in no time at all, he sent me this:

Well, not this one exactly, but it was a delicate glass heart that filled my hands. A blue one with a swirly pattern in it. And I heard, This, Rachel. This is you. 


God saw right to the heart of me. Literally. He recognizes how delicate I am—how fragile my heart is. I never think anyone notices that about me. But God does. And the heart was big; it filled my hands. I'm glad God sees that I have a big heart. Again, something I assume others don't notice. 

We had a moment that day, God and me. He showed me who I was in his eyes, and that means the world to me.

When was the last time you had a moment with God? 


  1. Hi Rachel - This is beautiful. Someone was praying with me once and asked God to show me how He saw me and it was a picture of a sapling planted at the river's edge, bending in the wind and I felt God was showing me that as long as I am rooted into the river of life, the hardships of the world may bend me, but I will not break. Kind of awesome, as at that time I was feeling like I could quite possibly splinter and crumble.
    God is awesome
    God bless

  2. Hello Rachel,

    Thank you for sharing your experience with me. Your experience touched my soul so deeply, so deep that I could not even begin to explain it to you.

    It's like your experience, is also a moment that God and I shared too... at the precise moment He lead me here to read this. I'm still crying about it.

    My heart is fragile too... I did blog about your blog here... and I hope that you won't be mad at me... too.

    God bless. With love and care from Kerrie. xOx

  3. Hello Rachel,

    Thank you for stopping by and leaving me such a heartwarming comment. Your thoughtfulness and kindness really brightened my day.

    I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
    God bless. With love and care from Kerrie. xOx

  4. Hi Rachel,
    Your message here was very touching. I have been trying to find my niche in the world as I seem to have a fear of society. I am doing a search on "solitude" and happened onto your blog. I ask you to please pray for me, I am having trouble with finding gainful employment and need a good job, I am getting old and work is harder to find as an older man. I am a sole provider and since I am having great difficulty in the world I am feeling quite desparate. God bless you and take care. In Christ, Rick

  5. @Anonymous Thanks for stopping by, Rick! I'll be praying for you.

  6. Perhaps what He sent you was truly a sign. Like chattering teeth, you need fixing, not because you are broken, but because you think too small of yourself.


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